FUMBLE!

To me, one of the most exciting plays that can occur in sports is in Football, when a fumble happens. For those of you that can’t tell a touchdown from a home run, this is what a fumble is:

So why do I love watching fumbles?

Pretty much, when someone screws up, then a fumble occurs. Just as fumbles represent screwing up, it also represents opportunity for other people to capitalize on it.

So in today’s lesson, we’re going to talk about

Fumbles in Relationships aka: when a hot girl breaks up with their boyfriend.

So you met a girl a while back and you think she’s really cool. You have good conversations and you find her really attractive. As we previously talked about, you’re having a great time with her when out comes from her mouth:

“Yeah, me and my boyfriend go there all the time!”

Cut.

Turns out that the table was reserved and the waitress was just letting you sit there temporarily. You can just picture this girl’s douchebag boyfriend pointing and laughing at you as he says

“Thanks for buying my girl a drink and keeping her company while I hang out with my boys. Don’t let my foot hit your ass on the way out.”

So, this girl’s boyfriend may have won this round but sometimes, it pays to have faith in people. You should have faith in humankind especially in the fact that we all share one common trait..namely: the ability to get sick of other people’s shit.
When I was younger, I saw an interesting poster. The poster had a picture of an attractive girl but underneath the picture, it had the following caption:

“No matter how hot she is, somewhere out there, someone’s sick of putting up with her shit”

True say, novelty poster…true say.

If you don’t believe me, just look in your closet and count the number of clothing items you bought thinking: “I’ll wear this shirt for a long time” but come next season, that beloved shirt just got relegated to the back of the closet…nearing dish cloth rags status. I think the lesson here is that people get bored and people love novelty. I have a perfectly good laptop but right now, I’m in the hunt for a new one simply because the old one has lost it’s “luster” (Whatever the hell that means)

Going back to relationships, sometimes people get sick of other people and they eject them from the passenger seat. Bad for him, good for other guys.
You see, sometimes people breakup prematurely and the guy miscalculates and dumps the girl in error. In other words, he screwed up.

FUMBLE!!!

In football, when you’re on offense, there are only certain players that are “eligible receivers”. You can’t just throw the ball to anyone. During a fumble however…anyone can grab the ball. The gloves are pretty much off.
Same goes in dating: when the girl was taken, guys in relationships weren’t having any of that. Once they hear that she’s single however…every guy is coming out of the woodwork as illustrated by Mr. LL Cool J:

So I was talking to one of my friends the other day and she’s recently single. Being young, she doesn’t really know about this “Fumble” phenomenon guys have so she wondered out loud to me:

“Ever since I’ve become single, a lot of my guy friends I haven’t talked to in a while have been messaging me, just saying hi…”

So I said: “Obviously, they’re trying to get with you”

She says: “No. They have girlfriends!”

Right.  For now.

Clearly, we can see what’s going on here.
You see, as my man Chris Rock professes: guys will only be as faithful as their options. Guys are selfish bastards and will always upgrade to first class when possible. Then again, it goes both ways: girls in relationships give numbers to other guys all the time. Back when I was a young, starry-eyed chap – I actually thought that being in a relationship made people good…but after a while, when you see infidelity happening right in front of your own eyes, you start believing that maybe relationships bring the bad out of some people. Just because you start calling someone “your boyfriend/girlfriend” doesn’t mean that the curiosity inside us…to see if someone else is better for us is exterminated.

This is called “being human.”

People cheat all the time. What does Revered Jesse Jackson, Albert Einstein and someone you probably know have in common? They’ve all cheated on their spouses.

So I think there are two things we need to learn here:

1) Just because your boyfriend’s friend is in a relationship, that doesn’t mean he never thinks about the day when she breaks up with her man. You should ask him why they never dated.

2) People cheat all the time. Always have and always will. You really can’t control that stuff.

Sometimes, when there’s a fumble and the other team scores…you shouldn’t take it too tough…

It’s all part of the game.

"Should have seen it coming when she said she only hooked up with him 8 times in college"